Monday Mirror Pep Talk

Dear self,

Don't apologize. Stop making moves or lack there of because of others around you. Lay down the burden of other people's happiness. It's not your responsibility to dumb yourself down, hold yourself back, or emotionally abuse your own soul to satisfy and heal other peoples' junk. They've got baggage, you've got baggage, let God unpack the suitcase. 

Anyone who requires you to earn their love is a person worth writing off. Boundaries don't make you the bad guy. Sure it may make others upset if they are used to you spoon feeding them or being the "yeah, of course!" girl. But let them put on their big kid panties and handle a little disappointment like the rest of us. 

Drawing that line in the sand says I respect you enough to let you know where I stand. You don't have to feel bad for knowing what you want. You admire that tenacity in others but seem to guilt yourself into thinking you're selfish for the same exact quality. Don't do that. 

Stop making excuses for yourself and for others. They're not responsible for the angst you allow them to cause you, anymore than you are responsible for the truths they can't handle. If you have resentment, hurt, frustration with them? That's on you. 

The only way to forgive yourself for being a doormat is to become the door. Firm and certain, the bouncer to inside. The keeper of the house. Addressing all those who approach head on. Be the door, not the mat. If you manifest your self worth in other's approval, you'll always fall short. You control your reaction and your perspective. The rest, let go. If you dwell too long in doubt you get comfy there. That's not your bed, don't lie in it. 

You know better than to second guess yourself. Get your heart and your head on the same page. When fear seeps in, fall back on the sureness you have in your purpose. In your maker. Trust your gut. Confidence and certainty don't make people think badly of you. And the best thing is? Their opinion doesn't matter anyway. 

God's already defined you. You are valuable, loved, chosen, and purposeful. Your passions were placed inside you. You were woven together intricately. Connect to the you that smiles with unwavering joy. Make decisions that suit your soul. Shine the light that glows when you live well into yourself. Live into those truths. Do it all, unapologetically.

Love, Candace